Clam chowder recipe from Bebop BYTES Back

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The following recipe was condensed from the book, Bebop BYTES Back (An Unconventional Guide to Computers), with the kind permission of Doone Publications Inc., Madison, AL

As we all know from our mother's knee, seafood is brain food, so what could be better than wrapping your laughing tackle around a fishy dish? But for what kind of fishy dish could we wish? The answer is "The Best Damn Clam Chowder in the World!"

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When our first book "Bebop to the Boolean Boogie (An Unconventional Guide to Electronics) hit the streets, it included the recipe for a "No holds barred Seafood Gumbo," and more than one reviewer stated: "This book is well worth the price for the gumbo recipe alone ......".		Beware! If you're under 21, male, or a politician, don't attempt to do anything on the culinary front without your mother's permission and supervision, because kitchens contain sharp things, hot things, and a variety of other potentially dangerous things!
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Only one man was less than happy! After plowing through the book, a friend of the authors, Chuck Paglicco, stumbled across the seafood gumbo recipe in the wee hours of the morning. Chuck was so perturbed that he was moved to come beating on our doors screaming "Seafood gumbo? Seafood gumbo? How could you stoop so low when we [Chuck and his wife Rita] have the recipe for the best damn clam chowder in the world?"
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Being a somewhat volatile Bostonian of Italian decent, Chuck isn't a man to be argued with when it comes to matters of haute cuisine, so we prostrated ourselves humbly, apologized profusely, and promised faithfully that our very next book would revel in concoctions of chowder-like nature ...... so here we are.

Preparing the clams:

	2 quarts (4 pints) of fresh clams.
	3 cups of water.
	2 medium to large-ish cloves of garlic.
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	First of all, let's begin by cleaning any pots and other debris that happen to be hanging around the kitchen, put everything away in its rightful place, and wipe down all of your work-surfaces. Trust us, this is the only way to cook and you'll enjoy the experience a whole lot more.
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	Thoroughly scrub and rinse your clams (the ocean isn't as clean as it used to be).
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	Finely dice the garlic and add it to 3 cups of water in a saucepan.
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	Bring your water and garlic mixture to the boil, use it to steam the clams for about eight minutes until their shells are open. Remove the clams and put them to one side, and reserve the liquid used to steam the clams in a jug for later use.
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Preparing the stock:

	0.5 cups of water.
	0.5 cups of dry Vermouth (substitute water if you're under 21 or a teetotaler).
	1 cup of the clam liquid that you reserved from preparing the clams.
	1 stick of celery.
	1 medium to large-ish carrot.
	1 medium to large-ish onion.
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	Before commencing work on the stock, clean any pots that you used while preparing the clams, put everything away, and wipe down all of your work-surfaces. Put 1 cup of the clam liquid that you reserved from the previous section into a saucepan, along with 0.5 cups of water and 0.5 cups of dry Vermouth (remember that you can substitute water for the Vermouth if you wish).
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	Wash your stick of celery and peel the carrot and onion. Chop everything into small-ish chunks and add them to the contents of the saucepan. Bring to a boil then simmer for about half an hour.
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	Strain the contents of the saucepan through a coffee filter. The result is your stock (the broth, not the coffee filter or its contents, which you should dispose of in a humane way). Reserve 2 cups of this stock (you can freeze any excess for future use)
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	While the stock is simmering, you can fruitfully employ your time by washing everything that you've used thus far and putting it away, followed by shucking the clams and preparing the remaining ingredients as discussed in the next (and final) section.
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Making the chowder:

	1 cup of clam liquid (reserved from the "preparing the clams" section).
	2 cups of stock (reserved from the "preparing the stock" section).
	1 cup of milk and 1 cup of single cream (or 2 cups of "half-and-half").
	2 cloves of garlic.
	1.5 cups halved button mushrooms.
	1.5 cups of finely chopped onion.
	2 cups cubed potato (half inch cubes).
	0.5 pounds of mild white fish.
	6 thick slices of bacon.
	1 teaspoon of salt.
	0.25 teaspoons of black pepper.
	0.25 teaspoons of white pepper.
	2 tablespoons (4 desert spoons) of cornstarch.
	3 tablespoons (6 desert spoons) of butter.
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	This is where the real fun begins. We're beginning to salivate just writing this, not the least that we've got a pot simmering away on the stove -- how else could we vouch for this taste-fest sensation?
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	Shuck the clams -- your kids can help with this if they're underfoot -- and chop them into small-ish pieces (the clams, not the kids).
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	Broil your fish until it's cooked and just a little crisp, then flake it up and set to one side.
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	Finely dice the onion and half the button mushrooms and put them to one side in separate bowls.
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	Chop the potatoes into half inch cubes and put them into a bowl of water.
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	Slice the bacon into three-quarter inch squares, saut� it with the butter in a large pot on a medium heat until its almost crisp, add the onion and saut� until it's almost cooked, then throw in the mushrooms and saut� until they're golden brown. Beware! Watch out for flying grease splatters.
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	Add the potatoes (along with 1.5 cups of the water they were soaking in) to the bacon and onions. Also add the salt and pepper (both black and white), then cook uncovered on a medium heat for around fifteen minutes until the potatoes are fork-soft. Be careful! Don't overcook the potatoes such that they fall apart.
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	Whisk the cornstarch into 1 cup of the clam liquid (from the "preparing the clams" section) and 2 cups of clam stock (from the "preparing the stock" section). Add this mixture to the pot and continue cooking on low to medium heat.
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	As soon as everything has heated through, add the white fish, the clams, the milk, and the cream. Continue heating until it's steaming, and keep it this way until you're convinced the clams are thoroughly cooked (at least 5 minutes).
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Once you've prepared your chowder, there are numerous ways in which you can serve it and guzzle it down, including liberally scattering oyster crackers on top of it and dunking French bread into it. However, our preferred technique is the way in which chowder is served on Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco as described below.
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Take one loaf of sourdough bread for every pair of people who are fortunate enough to be present. Cut the loaves in half and hollow them out, leaving approximately 0.5 inches of bread attached to the crust. Ladle the chowder into the half-loaves, add Tabasco sauce to taste, then guzzle the chowder with a spoon and munch down on the bread.
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There's nothing to compare to the experience of standing at the end of Fisherman's Wharf eating steaming hot chowder with a stiff breeze blowing off the bay and the roar of the Sea Lions in your ears. Of course, if you're serving this dish in Alabama in the middle of summer, then the heat and humidity may detract somewhat from the experience (the outside temperature is 105 degrees Fahrenheit as we pen these words) (see note #1). But you can always try replicating the feel of the wharf by turning the air conditioning on full and having a friend douse you with a bucket of iced water every ten minutes or so (see note #2 ) Enjoy!
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Note #1: For your edification, zero degrees in the Fahrenheit scale was originally defined as the freezing point of fortified wine.		Note #2: We strongly advise your closing the drapes first, otherwise the neighbors are sure to talk!

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